Hey guys, it’s been a while. I am approaching the end of my second pregnancy in Stuttgart and thought it is definitely time for another update here on the blog.
Maybe you remember my last post back in November 2021, where I shared the news that we are expecting or second baby (if not, you can find it here.) Ever since I haven’t been much active, blogging-wise. And I have missed it so much. I love sharing my love for Stuttgart with you guys, keeping you up to date about what’s going on and giving some local tips.
Pregnant in Stuttgart: Maternity sickness and co.
But this second pregnancy has been really tough. I can count the weeks were I felt healthy and strong on one hand. It all started with a severe maternity sickness that lastet for over 10 (ten!!) weeks and on most days I only managed to leave the bed to go to the bathroom to throw up. I felt extremely weak and miserable.
And when the maternity sickness started to fade away, the Kita bug season started. I caught every single infection our little girl brought home from her playgroup. And while she suffered from it just a few days, every single one hit me quite hard. I guess that’s because your immune system is low during pregnancy. So in the end I had five infections that lastet between one and two weeks each. Ufff….
Well, and the third trimester brought the normal tiredness and pregnancy problems that it holds in stock for most moms-to-be. I could sleep all day but after one hour of lying down either my hips hurt or I need to get up to pee – or both 😀
Pregnant in Stuttgart: Balancing work, family and health
So I had to make a decision where to step down a bit in order to manage my energy level throughout my pregnancy as well as I could. Obviously there is the little one and she is priority number one.
Then there are my clients: my German conversation group clients as well as the clients that book my Local Buddy Service. I didn’t want to let down any of them so it was a priority to keep on working with them for as long as I could. So the only part of my work I could cut short was the blog. My heart was bleeding.
Now, as I am approaching the end of the pregnancy, I am super nervous and excited to find out how life as a mom of two will be. I talked a lot to friends how already have more than one kid, I read books about raising siblings (I am the only child in my family so I have no personal experiences!) and did as much research as I could about what to expect the first days and weeks. But of course you can prepare yourself that much but in the end your reality might be very different to everything you are expecting. So I try to be as relaxed (haha, as if! :-)) and open to everything that comes our way as I can.
Pregnant in Stuttgart in times of Covid – let’s talk about mental health for a second…
During this second pregnancy I was not only feeling miserable because of the sicknesses. I was very low at some points mentally too. And I think it is very important to talk about that openly. When you follow influencer moms on Social Media you can get the impression mom life is super easy. They look happy on every picture, dressed up as if they do nothing all day but brush their hair and put on make up. BUT THAT’S NOT REAL! Well, maybe for some moms it is and bless them, they are lucky. But it is not the reality for others, me included. Mom life can be tough. Being a pregnant mom can be much tougher. Being a pregnant mom in the middle of a pandemic… well, I found it extremely hard and I have learned from many conversations that I am not the only one. So that’s why I want to address this topic here on the blog.
My friend Anne from fannetastic food (who had shared a very open post about life as a new mom of two on her blog a while ago) has sent me two really helpful books: Waiting for Birdy and Motherwhelmed [both affiliate links to amazon]. They both deal with exactly the topics I am dealing with myself at the moment. There were many, MANY times during this second pregnancy where I felt totally overwhelmed (or let’s say motherwhelmed :-)). The sicknesses, the Covid situation that made it hard to meet other people, my work… everything just seemed too much sometimes. Talking to friends and reading those books helped me tremendously. It made me see that I am not the only one who is struggling during her second pregnancy, especially in times of Covid. If you are in a similar situation I can only recommend talking about it! With friends, family members and professionals. I also included my midwife at some point, when I was really really low.
Mom life is tough. Period. We don’t need to pretend we aren’t struggling when in reality we really are. Speaking openly about how you’re feeling doesn’t only help you and your situation. It also helps others as it takes away the pressure to be the perfect mom on the outside when at the same side, you’re burned out on the inside. So this is a big YES to more honesty on blogs and social media! We moms are great! But we are allowed to feel motherwhelmed, tired, sad… you name it, from time to time!
Outlook on life as a mom of two
This hasn’t been your usual “oh pregnancy is SO great and wonderful” post, has it 🙂 I have to admit myself that I feel a bit sad when I think about this pregnancy and that it wasn’t as joyful and easy as my first one was. I have a bit of a bad conscience towards the baby because I feel he deserves the best and that also includes a happy pregnancy. It is a bit crazy, I know 🙂 But on the other hand I am SO happy and thankful for this pregnancy because it will bring this little boy into our lives. The most amazing gift life can give you. And yes, I am nervous about how life will be with two kids. My heart starts bleeding when I think of my little girl feeling jealous or sad because she isn’t the center of everything anymore once the baby is there. But at the same time I am SO grateful and happy for her that she does not have to grow up as the only child. You see, I have very mixed and confusing feelings here 🙂 But I know that everything will turn out great in the end. And that’s why I can’t wait for this little boy to arrive in our lives and for us to start this new chapter!
Workwise, I really really hope I will find my strength and creativity again in late spring or summer to start blogging on a regular basis again. I have SO many ideas for new posts 🙂 Next to my weekly articles about what’s up in Stuttgart I would like to share more insider tips and also more tips especially for families. And then there is the guide book “Highlights and Hidden Gems of Stuttgart” on which I am working FOR AGES and which is nearly finished. So I hope I can publish it this summer! Stay tuned for that, it will be awesome! Packed with SO MANY insider tips, many of them are not even known by most locals.
If you have read until here: you are amazing, thank you 🙂 If you are a mom of two or more or pregnant at the moment and can relate to some of the experiences I wrote about today, please feel free to share your thoughts with me in the comments.
And to all moms out there: We’ve got this! Chaka! 🙂